


Predestined Stars

by ayyyez



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: 707 route done prior, Angst, Eventual Smut, F/M, Flashbacks, Jumin Han's Route, Jumin Han/Mc - Freeform, Mutual Pining, Reset Theory (Mystic Messenger), minor canon material, mostly canon, slowish burn, unnamed MC, will tag as I go
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-22
Updated: 2017-12-27
Packaged: 2019-02-18 10:11:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13097904
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ayyyez/pseuds/ayyyez
Summary: Revolving around the idea of Reset Theory: MC has chosen Jumin, it's day 10 of the route and Saeyoung begins to have flashbacks to his route and his life with MC. Saeyoung discovers more each day only to realise the same thing might be happening to her. What does this mean for them?Story is also posted on my Tumblr: http://ayyyez.tumblr.com





	1. An Insomniac's Dream

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My first ever Mystic Messenger Fic and first time writing in present tense! Hope you enjoy!

It’s in the early hours of the morning, the point where night and dawn are blurred into a paradox of not quite late but not entirely early, when Saeyoung stirs from his dream. The glow from his monitor, left open, reads 3:02am when he jumps awake, sending his ergonomically shaped computer chair backwards with a harsh squeak. His wheels lock once he grabs hold of the desk in front him, fingers digging into the smooth wood. Sweat drips down his temples, hair sticking to his forehead as he clutches his chest to feel his rapidly beating heart, each thump against his ribcage sending him back into the depths of the dream.

The dream hadn’t seemed long but it was enough to shake him to the core. Saeyoung dreamt of her at the cabin, the one in the woods no one but he and Vanderwood knew of, waking up next to him in bed. He carefully recalls the moments of the dream most clear. The bedroom had been small and clean, aside from the stray teacup on the side table on her side of the bed and odd garments tossed across the floor. It didn’t throw the room off balance but it was a small indication, like a crease in the table cloth, that it was lived in. The room was barely furnished, packing only the essentials and saturated in white cloth that glowed in the morning sunlight. MC had moaned softly and squeezed her eyes shut and opened them again; she had rolled herself over to face him, giving a warm smile. They had both been naked, each littered in marks from the evening before; an intimate evening he knew but could not recall. Saeyoung swallows realising his throat is dry.

She looked childlike in the morning sunlight, innocently entangled in the white sheet as she shuffled her body closer to his. He had felt the warmth of her body as clear as day, touch as real as the hand against his chest now. Saeyoung had ghosted his fingers over her profile like it was second nature: over her forehead, down the cheek, over slightly parted lips, the dip of her chin, the side of her throat and down between her breasts to rest against her sternum. MC instinctively stirred, pushing into his touch with a sleepy sigh. Saeyoung smiled, his back settled against the headboard. He remembers wanting to stay there forever but reality had sat in the back of his mind like a reminder that finally pulled him to consciousness like a cruel punishment. 

It was a curious dream, vivid, like recalling a recent memory but the contents too transcendent to earn the title of reality. 

Saeyoung can’t deny the the intense feelings the dream brought on. He still feels the warm touch of her skin, soft against his hand, burning beneath his fingertips. He closes his eyes and clasps his left hand over the right, savouring the touch, drinking in the memory and burning it into the forefront of his mind. 

‘God, is this what it is like to have a crush?’ Saeyoung asks himself, a comforting habit. ‘Why did my fantasy feel so real?’ He sits back craning his neck from side to side to relieve the tension built up from his unsavoury sleeping position.

Saeyoung sighs, using his feet to drag him closer to the desk then adjusts his glasses. Squinting from the intensity of the screen lighting, his eyes follow the last lines of code to pinpoint where he is up to in the hacking job. 

‘Okay, let’s do this,’ he says to himself, cracking his knuckles dramatically. ‘707 ready for action.’ The last part was half hearted but it’s necessary to get through the morning. 

It isn’t long before the room fills with speedy typing, each tap of the keys drowns out the thoughts spinning through his mind. It’s hopeless though, he can’t stop thinking about the dream; the image of MC so in love with him and their naked limbs tangled together. The idea no longer seems a miracle, visually evident through the harboured desires of his subconscious pushing into his dreams. 

‘It was only a dream right?’ He asks himself, considering the possibilities. ‘Yes, of course it was.’ Saeyoung shakes his head and brings his hands to hover over the keyboard, pushing himself to keep working but they don’t cooperate, fingers refusing to type. 

There’s only her on his mind. Not codes or binary or the job he is supposed to crack by daybreak. He is staring into her wide and expressive eyes while they lie in that bed. All he thinks of his MC. Her, in the morning saturated in sunlight and hair disheveled across the white pillow, tips tickling his arm. Her, pressing a kiss to his nose, forehead, each cheek then with a giggle, their intended destination: his lips. Saeyoung can feel them now, brushing against his. There’s a sharp intake of breath and he presses his palm against his mouth, eyes widening at the images still clear. 

Having vivid dreams was nothing new but once he woke the painstaking details normally faded and he was left alone with a hollow reality. But these memories did not fade; they remained clear, replaying in his mind like memories on a loop. 

He can taste her on his lips; It’s a relatively sweet taste, green tea with traces of jasmine, something he brewed for her often, mixed with the undeniable taste of her. But how did he know that? Saeyoung hasn’t even met MC yet, only seen her through monitors and screens.

‘Argh,’ Saeyoung groans pressing his face into his palms. ‘What is wrong with me?’

It’s suddenly so much more difficult to breathe.

When MC first stumbled upon the chatroom, they were still so unaccustomed to each other and above everything so ingrained to be distrustful of the other’s words and movements. That was only over a week ago and now he is remembering moments that haven’t even happened. 

Saeyoung attempts to pick apart the situation with logic circumventing the most obvious answer that remains at the forefront on his mind. His throat itches from within, something festering there like a darkness threatening to reach the surface. Emotions long buried beneath his sternum have finally found an exit, an opportunity to unleash. 

Before he knows what he is doing, his phone is in his hand with RFA app open, chat room entered, eyes scanning for the name that is stuck on his mind. 

‘I wonder what you are up too at this time of night.’ 

The image of her entangled with Jumin forces it’s way into his mind, an involuntary reflex, his imagination haunting him. He visibly shudders at the the thought, remembering that MC had chosen Jumin not him. Of course she did, Jumin changed for her and she understood him. Fate had decided and there is nothing Saeyoung can do about it. 

He is suddenly at ease when he realises that she returned to Rika’s apartment earlier in the evening. They weren’t together, at least until the party.

‘I really need to sleep in a bed, I’m too delusional.’ He can hear Vanderwood’s reply, _You really need to finish this job and you’ve always been delusional._

Saeyoung chuckles, pushing himself up out of his chair to walk over to the small fridge at the end of his desk. A bright light shines as he opens the door, eyes searching for a can of PHD Pepper, his right hand searching above blindly for a packet of honey buddha chips. When both hands find what they seek he stands up and kicks the fridge door closed returning to the comfort of his computer chair.

The can opens with a hiss and Saeyoung downs a few decent gulps before he has time to dispute the action of the bubbling drink burning down his throat. He swallows it with a pronounced ‘ahhh’ and wipes his mouth against the back of his jacket sleeve.

Saeyoung had resigned himself to the fact that the fantasies were a one time thing only, even if he couldn’t quite convince himself that he would stop if MC enticed him into an intimate situation in real life. His cheeks burn when his mind wanders to countless scenarios and possibilities, all entailing farfetched ways to simply be with her. The urge to recoil is there, almost tangible in how he tenses up at the questionable thoughts. Saeyoung takes another sip and mutters to himself softly. ‘I need to get back to work.’ 

It’s when he places the can down with a thud that he makes the promise to stop getting distracted about trivial things. He works for the agency and can’t get caught up in caring about others. And besides, MC chose Jumin and they were in love. The situation was already sorted and all he had to do was play along. 

It’s been over a week now and they’ve fallen into a routine that would be selfish to unbalance. He missed his chance. The only thing left for him to do was his duties. Resigning himself to the fact that his imagination was nothing more than a distraction, his fingers began hammering against the keys of his keyboard continuing with the job.

The minutes rolled by like hours, Saeyoung’s upper lip flinching each time his concentration dared to break. Anyone looking at him may not notice his distraction, his fingers still taping away but he knew it was at least half the speed he’s capable of on a bad day. The internal struggle within him burns for release—for satisfaction. 

With a groan he reaches for his drink, downing the last drops of PHD Pepper. He considers taking a walk, to go outside and look up at the night sky. The stars would be visible by now and the forecast predicted a clear night. 

_‘I just want to give them all to you, Seven.’_ An echo in his mind. 

The can crushes in his hand. 

‘What was that?’ He asks, more the room than himself. He forces his eyes shut and releases the crushed can, hearing the aluminium bounce onto the floor. 

Did he just experience another…fantasy? It seemed too real, the voice too tangible to be a fabrication of his subconscious. An image flashed to the forefront of his mind of a phone call long forgotten, him analysing an email and her entertaining his fancies. 

‘All of the…stars?’

Saeyoung shook his head furiously, dispelling all theories and circumvented his mind to a logical outcome. It was simply impossible, something that had indeed happened but that he perhaps had forgotten in his sleep deprived state. It’d been a long week.

Two violent buzzes vibrate through the desk causing him to jump. He blinks a few times before his eyes lock onto the culprit, realising he received a message; a message from MC. He observes the notification and wonders what would come out of explaining to MC what was going on with him. Saeyoung is afraid that by even giving an inkling of his thoughts, his inner most desires, she would somehow lose some of her brightness, wilting like a sunflower deprived of sun. He has already taken so much from her and Jumin so everything he has to give would never amount to the unattainable enough compared to what they offered each other. So he reluctantly replies, with his usual 707 composure, a facade he will maintain for her. 

_‘Maybe you’re just tired, you should rest from time to time.’_ Her voice penetrating his mind again. 

Saeyoung buries his face in his hands and groans. ‘I’m starting to lose it.’ The emotions are taking over now, refusing to stay buried. ‘I’ve already lost it’ 

His brows furrow together, an involuntary reflex with the overwhelming nature of everything he is feeling. He’s left breathless, winded but all he can do is laugh; At the ridiculousness of the situation, his dwindling sanity and his hopeless control over emotions. 

Saeyoung’s laughing only grows when he feels his phone buzzing in his hand, MC’s icon flashing in front of his eyes. He stops for a hairsplitting second, concentrating on his thumb running across the smooth screen of his phone, dangerously close to the answer button. The laughing intensifies as he brushes over it, bringing the phone to his ear, tears already welling in his eyes.

‘Are you okay?’ Comes her voice on the other end. It’s exactly as he recalled from his dreams—the memories of a forgotten life. 

‘No, I’m not…’ there’s more laughing from him, ‘but you don’t care about me.’ He hesitates, the urge to retreat palpable but with his emotions reeling there’s nothing to stop him. ‘You only care about Jumin.’ He says matter-of-factly. ‘I’m nothing. My heart’s crumbled into breadcrumbs. So sad, my poor breadcrumbs, I’ll eat you up…Meet your friends inside my stomach.’ There’s nothing to hold back his laughing now, he’s crossed the invisible line he set himself earlier in a matter of seconds. 

There’s only breathing from her end, he can practically feel her concern, hear the light beginning to waiver because of him. No, he won’t let that happen.

‘I heard eating sweets helps when you feel like this.’ He’s trying to maintain the 707 persona but with more laughter comes even more pain. ‘No…’ he whispers. ‘Ugh a tear just feel from my eyes.’ He reaches out to touch the tear, sweeping it with his finger and pulling it down to observe. His brow creases, his lip trembles and his resolve shatters. 

‘What’s wrong with me? Am I bipolar or something?’ An involuntary thought pops into his head, memories of his brother and mother and the constant arguments. 

‘Seven…’ Her voice is soft and wavering. ‘Is there anything I can do to help?’ 

He knows he needs to stop now.

‘I think my breadcrumb friends have something to say. I’m gonna go talk with my breadcrumbs for a bit.’ The hand holding his phone is trembling. ‘Bye.’ 

He drops his phone against the desk after hitting the end call button. The tears are streaming down his face, cheeks flushed and lips trembling. In one swift motion he pulls his glasses off and drops his head into his arm, burying it there against the desk. 

Saeyoung’s whole body is shaking now, the tears hot and wet in his eyes falling harder than ever. His mind whispers, _Don’t do it. Don’t do this…it doesn’t matter, it’s not real_. But it is futile. ‘I don’t understand!’ he screams against his jacket sleeve, letting his emotions get the best of him. ‘If this is all real then why didn’t she choose me?’

It’s a question he asked himself even before the dream.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, feel free to leave a comment or a kudos!


	2. Recognition

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saeyoung breaks down over Saeran and forces himself to attend the party to see MC.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Totally vibe on Angus and Julia Stone's song 'The Devil's Tears' every time I write for this fic.

It’s morning by the time Saeyoung finished his assignment, hours later than he had originally expected but done none the less. He was too distracted, thinking about Saeran, V and above all else, MC. The idea of her truly alluded him. Even now, thinking about it in the light of day, away from the emotional pull of night and logically playing out every possibility other than what he believes to be nothing more than a fantasy. 

The grip on his phone tightens, the strain causing his fingers to turn shades of red and white while his eyes linger on the calling icon for the hundredth time this morning. Every call to V either went to the message bank or worse did not go through at all and each time his questions went unanswered Saeyoung felt the weight in his chest grow heavier. This time he doesn’t bother bringing the phone to his ear, eyes watching the six green arrows flashing across the screen indicating the call connecting but not answered. He feels caught in a trance, much like the one from his dream caught by MC’s eyes but this one is different; he is not full of joy and hopeful of what is to come; he is afraid and anxious, dreading the answers to every question he needs to ask. 

There’s a part of him that’s glad V hasn’t answered, a more selfish part of him hopes that he never does. But it’s a fleeting thought at best for he knows he needs the truth if he is ever going control the darkness inside that causes him and everyone around such agony. He needs to feel the guilt wrought from his actions. He has to suffer so that no-one else can. 

His lungs became constricting of their rhythmical movements when he tried to find logical reasons for the situation he and his brother now find themselves in. Finding it harder to breath as he picks apart each word, every sentence Rika and V had fed him over the years, attempting to find the point where it all went wrong. As if in the pocket beneath his sternum, a hollow area beside his heart, all this darkness he buries with his past actions and voiding emotions was spreading inside of him, like a sickness that would continue until it consumed him both body and soul.

The wheels of his computer chair squeak as it rolls back in a violent push. Saeyoung let’s his phone fall to the desk with a thud, the call fail message still gracing his screen, taunting him with theories and the unknown. He thinks about calling her but it’s not feasible, not after their phone call they shared in the vulnerable hours of the morning and the sorrow filled chatroom messages where he broke his 707 persona. It had been pitiful, the way he let his emotions get the better of him especially when he promised not to do so in front of her. 

Hunching over the desk her forcibly pushes himself up and begins stripping articles of clothing on his way to the bathroom. It’s silent inside the bunker, the sound of his own footfalls and rattling of the wooden doors filling the house, echoing into him the loneliness of his existence. It’s a reminder that even his life as an agent, that was supposed to serve as a way out for him and Saeran, was nothing more than a lie. 

With the last article of clothing removed Saeyoung reaches the bathroom and slams the door closed, attempting to physically shut out his thoughts in the process. The moment he catches a glance of himself in the mirror, skimming over puffy eyes and reddening cheeks, he realises he hasn’t stopped crying. There’s a dulling headache when he notices this but instead of acknowledging the shell of the broken man in front of him he rips his glasses off and tosses them in the sink. 

With his sight and feelings forgotten he reaches out to the shower, fumbling the nobs with one hand while the other grasps the wall for stability. As the water crashes beside him filling up the silent room with white noise, each droplet falling brought forth a fixed memory of the past coupled with ways he could have done better. A wave of nausea overcomes him, whether from lack of real food or the anxiety of the moment he isn’t sure but it is something he will have to remedy before the party. 

Satisfied that water has had enough time to warm up, Saeyoung steps below the shower head, not bothering to reach out his hand to check the temperature first. It’s hot, almost scolding but his body feels a numbing pleasure beneath the stream and it isn’t long before his body adjusts. He pushes the thoughts of Saeran aside and V too, fearing he will be sick if he thinks about them any longer. 

The party, that was all that mattered. He has to go for her, he has to see MC and figure things out once and for all.

A selfish need clouds his mind and allows him to reminisce in his fantasies. For a split second he fears he’s forgotten them, that all the images have fled from his mind because such thoughts and feelings don’t truly belong to him. Perhaps they had once but now it seemed like he had stolen them from their rightful owner, that he is foolishly indulging and vicariously living through those he is jealous of. But he still sees her in that bed beside him, smiling, giggling, shifting to touch him and then…he shivers. 

‘No, not that,’ he whispers. ‘I can’t.’ He pushes the intimacy of it all aside and dives headfirst into the happiness, the excitement he felt lying with her in that fantasy. Even if the memory isn’t real he is sure that the feelings are. He can feel them now, palpable in the way his chest seems to bloom at the image, a feeling not yet explored but ultimately there, like the salt in the ocean, one cannot grasp it whole but then it sinks into the skin, finds it’s way to the hair and taste is tangible when swallowed.

A craving grows within him, one for a certain sweet taste of tea and jasmine. The image at the forefront of his mind is clearcut, seamlessly contoured and with subtle palette of pinks and reds that form the image of her lips. It’s a thought that lingers, raising more questions than it answers but still he lets himself feel it. He swipes his tongue over his bottom lip then presses them together on instinct. The taste wasn’t there but he could recall it clearly, his sensory recollection running on a high. 

Another shiver runs through his body, dancing across his skin despite the hot water crashing against it and then other memories push their way into his mind again. He balls his fists and sighs. 

The water is shut off, his hand blindly reaching for a towel to dry himself with. As he gathers the last droplets off his skin the towel moves to his hair and he wonders if V will make an appearance at the party. Whether he will have the chance to question him with the rest of the drama going on with Jumin and the scheming women. 

He let the towel drop the floor behind him and fished his glasses from the sink to place them back on the bridge of his nose. The mirror in front of him was fogged over from the heat and he considers whether he should bother checking his appearance again. The hesitation was almost overpowered by the disseverance, wanting to avoid his reflection but he knew there would be questions from the others at the party if he appeared in anyway disheveled or distraught. The 707 persona had to prevail even if it kills him inside to do it. 

Lifting his hand he he wipes it over the mirror, removing the condensation and revealing his reflection. His face seems fine except for his eyes which still appear red but no longer puffy. He palms his hands up his cheeks, dragging the skin with his fingertips then rubs his eyes. Another groan escapes his lips.

He dips his head and his wet bangs fall down his face. If eyes are the window to the soul then his scream guilt and sorrow. But MC’s eyes had voiced something altogether different, they had shown him hope and understanding. The question that ran through his mind remained: would they still show him that in person? 

The woodwork shakes when Saeyoung closes the bathroom door shut behind him and the floorboards of his bedroom creak when his footsteps cross the threshold. He will have to clean the bathroom when he returns home. He wants to go to the kitchen to grab a bag of chips to fill his stomach but there’s something drawing him to the mugs, beckoning him to drink a hot beverage instead. He isn’t even sure he owns coffee, let alone any other stock standard mix that most people keep in their homes. The staples in his home consisted of PhD Pepper and Honey Buddha chips and his diet was anything but normal. 

On instinct he opens the cupboard above the kettle, bought with good intentions but which remained untouched. There in the back behind boxes of forgotten chips, pushed aside for their successor sat a green box he had never seen before. Once he retrieved it and placed it on the counter his eyes read over the contents and suddenly his heart stops. 

‘But that’s…’ an unfinished sentence leaves his lips without hope of continuing. 

He steps back and clutches the cross that hangs from his neck, standing there hearing nothing but his own beating heart, echoing through his blood stream up to his thrumming temples. He blinks, once, twice and another for good measure before his fingers are itching to rub his eyes from their sockets. 

There’s hesitation in his actions before he steps forward again, approaching the box with caution. His hands are shaking when he lifts the box, reading the contents expectantly, already knowing the words before his mind processes them. What he doesn’t understand is how the box got there, never having purchased tea in his life nor did he know the significance of this particular kind until earlier in the morning. Green tea with jasmine.

An exasperated sigh leaves his lips and he turns to return to his room. A mere glance at the clock beside his bed reminds him that he is running late. He hums a nonsensical tune as he retrieves his formalwear for the party and dresses, drowning out the waves of nausea down in his gut. His darkness fights tooth and claw to try and weasel it’s way back into his conscious thought but his mind responds that he doesn’t have a clue it’s there. The mask is back up and his mind carefully caged as he attempts to channel his happier self in anticipation for the party. 

Everything moves quickly from there, finding a set of car keys, entering one of his babies and speeding out of the garage and onto the road. He is in a dissociative state for the first length of the journey, body functioning entirely on autopilot, anticipating gear shifts, breaking and turning in a haze. It’s when he is a third of the way to the party location that he has to pull over. 

His tyres squeal, spinning the rubber onto the tarmac, as he swerves his car onto the rubble of the dirt bordering the road. It’s hard to draw deeper breaths, his hands shaking as he clutches the steering wheel impossibly hard while he concentrates on stopping his lower lip from trembling. Saeyoung can feel his heart rise up in his throat; he feels the tears bitterly stinging at his eyes but not without a fight. He hits the steering wheel with the palm of his hand then grabs it again shaking his whole body while letting out a raw scream that scrapped his throat on the way out. There was no holding back now, as he hits the steering wheel again, this time with both hands, accidentally grazing the horn in the process. 

There’s another loud thud, his forehead hitting the leather cover of his steering wheel. His breathing comes out in shallows puffs, strangling with whines and sobs as he attempts to reign in his emotions and regain his composure. But he can feel his whole body shaking now, each violent tremble reverberating throughout his body and pulling out more emotions and more memories. His eyes are stinging, burning with tears long kept buried that want to escape. 

‘Damn it,’ he whispers. ‘Damn it!’ This time there’s more aggression. 

He sits back in one swift motion, not worrying about tidiness as he wipes his nose on his sleeve and fishes his phone out of his pocket. Out of routine his fingers find V’s icon and press call, attempting for another time that day to get through to the RFA president. When it fails to connect he screams again, finally letting his emotions get the best of him. 

‘Damn it,’ he whines, tossing the phone onto the passenger seat. 

It takes ten minutes for him to finally calm himself, letting the tears fall until they stop on their own accord. He wants to see V and find out everything that had been kept hidden from him about Saeran—to ask _why_? Why he had done it, why he had let it happen, why, why, why? There is a guiltier part of him that wants something more than to ask why though, it’s the part that wants to see MC. The thought of her simply brought up more unanswered questions his heart desired answered. 

Saeyoung pulls down the sun-visor to where the mirror hid and for the third time that day scrutinises his appearance. Nothing to be desired in such a state but he knew there would be time to reprimand his poor appearance later. First he needs to get to the party. 

He pushes the sun-visor back up, no longer having it obstructing his view and starts his car up again. There’s a shaky intake of breath before he flicks the blinker on and rejoins the road. His hands are no longer shaking and his emotions once raw on the surface now bury themselves beneath his sternum with the rest of his darkness. 

There, driving along the winding roads, he falls into another distracted state until he arrives at the venue. He wastes no time parking his car and exiting, examining himself in the side mirror as he straightens his tie. It feels far too tight, almost chokingly so but doesn’t dare loosen it any more for fears of appearing sloppy. True, it was not something he worried about in the past but today was different—today he was finally seeing MC in person. But it didn’t feel like the first time. An image of the fantasy threatens to invade his mind but he succeeds in pushing it out. 

The crowd is enormous thanks to the press and rumours of the company, giving Saeyoung a struggle to push through the crowd to where Jaehee stood, signing in guests. When she spots him she greets him and sighs in relief. 

‘Jaehee,’ Saeyoung begins, eyes scanning the crowd. ‘Is MC here yet?’ 

‘Not yet.’

‘Is Jumin here?’ He tries to hide the distain in his voice but she doesn’t seem to notice. 

‘I have not seen him yet.’ Jaehee steps forward to greet more guests and Saeyoung takes this as his opportunity to step inside the venue. 

When he enters through the door, the size of the crowd is much larger than he had been expecting, even with all the rabble outside. He was slightly annoyed at the scale of the party, hoping it would have been an opportunity to remain intimate with the other RFA members but he is impressed that MC pulled together everything in just over a week. A weak smile spreads across his face at the thought of seeing her. 

The smile fades as his eyes catch Jumin’s who stands to the side of the entrance as if waiting, probably for MC. Saeyoung attempts to pretend he didn’t see him and steps forward but then Jumin calls his name. 

‘Luciel,’ came the monotone voice. He hesitates turning around, weighing his options but then scolds himself for acting that way toward his friend. 

‘Jumin,’ he calls back, turning around with a fake smile. ‘Waiting for MC?’ He forceshis face not cringe at mentioning her name to him. 

‘Yes,’ Jumin replies, fiddling with his cufflink. ‘Could I ask you for a favour?’ 

‘Of course,’ Saeyoung replies, mentally noting how he would rather die at that moment than do something that concerns their relationship. 

‘MC is due to arrive at any minute, could you escort her inside while I set up for the press?’ 

‘Right.’ His forced smile grows, attempting to play the part. ‘I’ll take care of it now.’ 

‘Thank you, Luciel.’ Jumin turns to walk away into the crowd but Saeyoung calls out to him. 

‘Jumin!’ He turns around with a raised brow. ‘Has V arrived yet?’ 

‘Not that I have seen.’ Saeyoung feels his expression falter. ‘I’m sure he will turn up.’ A tinge of guilt rises in his chest when he realises Jumin had said that to make him feel better but he’s gone before Saeyoung can confirm. 

With a heavy sigh, Saeyoung retraces his steps, passing Zen on the way as he returns to Jaehee. It takes him a few seconds to realise someone else is walking over next to Jaehee. Saeyoung recognises her immediately. He knew that long, flowing hair, that cascaded down her body, wrapping around the blue and white silks of her dress, shaping her like a lover. He knew that kind smile and those striking eyes. What he isn’t prepared for is just how expressive and wide those eyes are in person, reflecting emotions he hadn’t known existed. 

He realises then that she has noticed his presence and he has to say something. 

‘Oh! MC, you’re here!’ Saeyoung attempts to be pleasantly surprised without any hint of what’s truly bothering him. 

‘Hello Seven!’ Jaehee begins, ‘So you already know what MC looks like…’ He swallows thickly, feeling the vile slide down his throat. 

‘Yes…’ He forces another smile, ‘It’s nice to meet you.’ But it doesn’t feel like the first time and he tries to keep his emotions in check. ‘Jumin arrived right after Mr Han, did you see V?’ 

Jaehee replies that she hasn’t and he feels the weight in his chest return. ‘Where did he go?’ Saeyoung mutters more to himself than to them. ‘Jumin told me to bring MC…can I take her?’ 

‘Is there a problem?’ Jaehee asks and it takes everything in him not to reply with yes. 

‘Nothing that I know of.’ His smile strains. ‘I’m sure he just misses her.’ He feels his heart break. ‘MC will you follow me?’ There’s a kind smile from her followed by a nod and Saeyoung can feel his cheeks heat up. She is too kind for her own good and he fears that someone could take advantage of that.

They enter the venue and find a place near the back where Saeyoung decides to at least warn her of his fears even if he can’t tell her everything. He takes a step closer to her, mouth opened ready to speak when he catches a scent of something sweet. A frown creases his brow as he tries to figure out what it is. Another wave of the scent is carried towards him when she flicks her hair behind her shoulder. It’s stronger now, and he recognises it as a smelling flower he had come across years before he believes is called a gardenia. He’s intoxicated by it for a moment before he pulls himself back to reality. 

He clears his throat and she turns to him. ‘I’m telling you this now but when you first went to Rika’s apartment, you followed someone you didn’t know…I’m so glad nothing happened to you.’ He can’t maintain the smile but he tries to steady his voice. ‘MC, you really can’t download just any app from now on, alright?’ His voice sounds too raw and suddenly he is self-conscious of everything he is saying. The emotions are welling up inside him once again and he can’t control it, not even for her. 

‘Seven?’ Her voice is quiet but certain, enough to bring his eyes to meet her gaze. ‘Are you…’ the sentence goes unfinished, their eyes communicating together what words can’t. Saeyoung has never experienced something so intense in his life and then suddenly she’s taking a step toward him and wrapping her arms around his neck, burying her head against his shoulder. 

His eyes widen once he realises what is happening, recognising the warmth and scent exuding from her and onto him. He suddenly wants to ask her what love feels like when you’re afraid of the person you thought you were meant to be with forever; to ask her if she believes in forever. There are many unanswered questions without logic or reason to provide answer for them. Saeyoung wraps his arms around her, taken back by the moment when something triggers in his mind. It’s another memory, no, a fantasy—this one just as clear as the others. 

They’re outside the cabin, having just arrived there after escaping…something he can’t quite remember. Saeyoung is standing in front of her, just as he was in reality now but in the fantasy there was no one else around. 

‘Why are you so…’ Saeyoung trailed off. Even in his fantasy he could not be honest. 

‘Why am I so what?’ MC replied, coaxing her head to the side slightly, like a curious animal.

‘It’s nothing.’ He turned to pick up his hacking equipment but was stopped when her hand caught his arm. 

‘Tell me.’ MC turned him around to face her and a gentle hand cupped his cheek. ‘We promised to be honest with each other from now on, remember?’

‘I was just wondering how you could be so… you?’ It started as a statement but ended uncertain. ‘I mean,’ he shook his head, ‘you’re just so kind and forgiving. It makes me want to be the same but I don’t know if I can.’ _My cynicism runs too deep._

There was no verbal answer but the light in her eyes and the smile across her face made sure he understood. Saeyoung felt a weight lift from him at that moment. He felt her thumb reach his bottom lip and brush across it causing his breath to hitch. Suddenly there was an urge within him, one that made him want to unlock his desires toward her completely. But then she leant forward and it all became too real.

‘Don’t,’ he rasped, aware of his fists clenching. 

Suddenly he hears a voice that pulls him from the memory and blinks to see MC staring at him, a look of concern in her eyes. 

‘Seven?’ She asks, mouth open to ask more when she is cut off by another voice. 

‘Luciel,’ he turns to find V. ‘Here.’

‘V…’ all the questions flow through his mind at the sight of him. 

‘I’m sorry I avoided your calls Luciel.’ V turns to MC. ‘Jumin is preparing for something, he’ll be back soon.’ A warm smile from V before he turns back to Saeyoung. ‘Luciel…’ 

‘Yeah?’ There’s no energy in Saeyoung to ask him anything else. 

‘I understand how frustrated you are, let’s talk once the party is over. For real this time.’ V gave a small smile to indicate that he was not lying but Saeyoung can’t return it. An ease falls over him knowing he can finally find out the truth but there is still a darkness festering inside him. 

That’s when the night takes off, between Glam Choi, Sarah and Jumin’s announcements the audience and media spirals with an uproar. Saeyoung has to admit the twinge at his heart strings with Jumin’s confession but knows he has to try his best to be a friend toward MC. 

When all the focus turns to her he leans in and whispers, ‘You have to smile right now, no matter how you feel.’ He wanted to add that he knew how it felt but knew it would only confuse her more. It is after that the reporters turn toward MC and his need to protect her kicks into overdrive, internally border lining on possession.

He steps in front of her with arms spread like a shield and scowls at the reporters. ‘Guys, you’re not welcome here!’ He turns to the other members. ‘Protect her!’ There’s no forgiveness in his voice. He turns back to MC, seeing her beautiful eyes widening in fear. ‘MC, just stand right behind me, I’ll protect you.’ He gives her a smile, the only genuine one of the evening. His breath catches when she returns it and mouths a thank you to him. Perhaps there is hope for them after all. 

The thought is cut short as Saeyoung sees Jumin make his way through the crowd toward MC then the confession as he drops to one knee. Saeyoung feels his heart shatter completely when Jumin presents her with the ring and he didn’t need to hear her say yes. He had been watching her lips at the time, the way they contoured upward in a smile and mouthed yes. A yes to Jumin and not him.

Even though he is watching it with his own eyes, Saeyoung can’t help but feel it should have been him not Jumin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, hope you enjoyed. More to come soon with MC POV too!

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: none of the characters belong to me as they belong to cheritz games. I am only using them for entertainment and creative purposes of the story.


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